People in India, if they are in-charge of something, they want to shove their authority on you. I am not talking about VIPs. I am talking about ordinary police constables, peons in offices, security guards, and people like that.. They want to show and shove their authority on you.
This incident happened recently.
I went to an Indian Temple here in California. I parked my car. There were 60 parking spaces. There was not a single car that was parked. Therefore, I deliberately took 2 parking spaces. I turned off the ignition and got down from the car. An Indian lady (in saree) approached me. Here is our conversation:
Lady: Do you know you have parked here illegally? (I did not appreciate the tone in which she was communicating with me)
I would have said "sorry" if her modulation was civilized.
Me: What did you say?
Lady: You have parked here illegally. You have taken 2 spaces (It is not against the law in California if you take 2 spaces in a private parking lot. This parking lot was inside the temple and therefore it is a private parking lot.)
Me: What is your problem?
Lady: How will other cars can park if you take 2 spaces?
Me: I am going to pray the God and will be back in 5 minutes. There are 60 parking spaces here. Are you saying these 60 parking spaces will be filled in the next 5 minutes?
Lady: What you are doing is illegal.
Me: Are you the Police?
Lady: Yes, I am
(Now I am really angry)
Me: Show me your Police Badge.
Lady: I am not a real police. I am temple management,. You come to my office and I will show you my temple badge.
Me: I came to pray my God for 5 minutes. I did not come here to see your temple badge. If you want to show me your temple badge, run back to your office and bring your badge within 5 minutes. Now get off my face.
I walked away.
Yes, I agree by taking 2 spaces I was discourteous. I did not follow the proper etiquette. But did not break any law.
(Side Bar: While writing this blog post, I just remembered reading an article in the Wall Street Journal long time ago. They were interviewing an Under Secretary in the Finance Ministry for the Government of India in New Delhi. During the interview, he said:
"I live in RK Puram. I go by bus to my office. I don’t have any money during the last 5 days of the month. Me and my family struggle to eat. But, in my office, I can make JRD Tata wait outside my office for 15 minutes. I am proud of that."
So much for proud and power.
Come on SG.
ReplyDeleteCausing trouble in a parking lot?
What's wrong with you?
Regards,
Dez Bryant
Thanks for your comments Dez. I always wanted to ask you this question. What were you doing in that Walmart parking lot at 6 am in the morning? And, all the three cars that were involved (Mercedes, Cadillac, and a Bentley) were registered in your name.
DeleteOne of my friends and his girlfriend/fiancee were sitting by the sarovar in Bangla Sahib Gurudwara in Delhi, when one Sewadar came to them and told them to get out of there. He asked why? And the answer was something like I know what you boys and girls come here for, as if instead of being a young couple, they were terrorists or drug peddlers! That Sewadar might still be haunting young couples there, but I have a good chance of being a kind of best man in their Hindu marriage.
ReplyDeleteWhole of India is like a hierarchy. Everyone is above someone and is below someone else. This is why the Under Secretary was so happy about the JRD Tata thing: he wouldn't have any chance to get respect or even attention from Tata, so he was relishing the chance he got to harass him!
I have learnt that respect for human beings is low here in India. You are someone's child, you work for someone or some organisation, you live in a big house or you drive such a car or bike: these are the parameters of respect. God forbid if you have a "low" birth.
I have also learnt that giving respect to others makes very easy to get things done. A few people won't still help you, but then they won't help anyone :-)
Bhagwant Mann, MP and Aam Aadmi Party leader says one thing in his speeches: Punjabis are successful everywhere in the world except Punjab! I think this argument can easily be extended to Indians and India.
Thanks for your comments Karunesh. Agree with you completely. My congratulations to your friend and his fiancé. Please convey my best wishes to them.
DeleteYesterday we faced similar issue. We parked car in front of someone's house and a person living in a different house came and shouted at us asking us not to park. It is not her house so why does she care so much. There is no "no parking" sign there so how can she say we cannot park. Agree with you about the authority part.
ReplyDelete-Avada Kedavra
Thanks for your comments Ash. People think the whole street belong to them. Attitude problem.
DeleteTone matters thats all... I also think so... Sometimes people think they are powerful and would not think twice before misusing it... :) All said and done, this incident gave a topic to blog - thats all matters!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Satya. As they say here, if you are handed a lemon make a lemonade out of it. As you said, this bad incident gave me a topic to blog.
DeleteThis is so prevelant here in India that we think its the norm. Perhaps; a nice tone would've helped. I think the lady thought she could intimidate you. I was visualising the entire conversation SG, knowing how you would've given it back to her with that smirk on your face :-D
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Insignia. Brought smiles to me. You know me for a long time and even met me a few times. She thought she could intimidate me. But chose the wrong person.
Delete"But man, proud man,
ReplyDeleteDress'd in a little brief authority,
Most ignorant of what he's most assur'd—
His glassy essence—like an angry ape
Plays such fantastic tricks before high heaven
As makes the angels weep; who, with our spleens,
Would all themselves laugh mortal."
Shakespeare
Thanks for your comments Mr. KP. You are the best. Perfect quote from Shakespeare.
DeleteSometimes, people use others' minor mistakes as an excuse to abuse them. They are basically abusive and would want to take up every available opportunity. Good that you gave her back what she deserved. If many people start doing it, ppl like these would soften up a bit.
ReplyDeleteDestination Infinity
Thanks for your comments Rajesh. And, thanks for your support. If you keep quiet people think of it as your weakness. (It is not that I keep quiet at any time.)
DeleteYes, voice modulation is very important. We can see this attitude in billing counters in supermarkets here...even if we ask about some doubt, they reply rudely. My friend says for this attitude as 'complex'. They can't be rude anywhere else...they don't get respect anywhere else, like your undersectretary. Once they get out of their seats, they are a 'nobody'.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Sandhya. You are correct. Had she pointed out my discourteous behavior, I would have apologized. My "undersecretary"! HaHaHa.
DeleteNice anecdote to blog about. I am sure you would not have used two parking spaces if there were lots of cars needing parking space. However, I hope she is as strict as she was with you when lots of people need to park and some stupid person parks it wrongly occupying two parking spaces.
ReplyDeleteYou know some people have no sense especially in India they think they own the whole street, and do very bad parking, and they always try to take more space than needed, but the same people would follow the rule and park it properly when they are abroad.
Thanks for your comments Rama. I was offended by her tone of voice and modulation. She thought she was talking to a FOB (Fresh off the Boat) driving with an international license issued by some government department in Chennai. So she thought she could intimidate me with her "touch" voice. B
Delete❤ Hello!,
ReplyDeleteGreat post, I like it :)
I followed your blog, could you follow mine?
a greeting <3
Thanks for your comments Arual. And, welcome to my blog. I will follow your blog. But, I am unlucky, your blog post is written in Spanish. I do not speak Spanish. I am trying to learn Spanish
Deletelanguage.
Ethically, it was wrong to take up two space to park a car while it may not be illegal for private parking lot.
ReplyDeleteIf I were you, I would just parked my car correctly in a single space and apologize to her. That just me.
By the way, what is your thought on the devotees who leave the shoes in front of the main entrance of Hindu temples eventhough there are big signs saying " PLS DO NOT LEAVE YOUR SHOES HERE"
Thanks for your comments Vijay. And, welcome to my blog. I would have done the same thing as you if only she did not have that arrogant and harsh voice.
DeleteI have seen in many temples people leave the shoes in those places where there is a sign "PLS DO NOT LEAVE YOUR SHOES HERE". If I were a volunteer, I would remove all those shoes and put them in the right place. That would teach them a lesson.
Vijay, please visit here as often as possible. Thanks.
Agree. It happens a lot. Power , even if it is about parking lots , gets to the heads of most people
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Sujatha. You are correct.
DeleteAah! It's not what you say but how you say, that's important.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Shilpa. As you correctly pointed out, it is how you say matters.
Delete:) it happens it happens :) some people have a chip on their shoulder for no apparant reason .. never mind .. Ignore such silly people..
ReplyDeleteBikram's
Thanks for your comments Bikram. Ignore such silly people. That is what I did.
DeleteWhat is it with people! I mean it's California after all, unlike our crowded India. Lotcha space, take all ye want.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments wildflower. And, welcome to my blog. I like your attitude. HaHaHa.
Deletewildflower, please visit here as often as possible. Thanks.
I am wondering about the motive behind that deliberate act.I am sure there was a solid reason behind it
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Indu. And, welcome to my blog. When I entered the parking lot, it was empty. I was driving slowly and deciding which parking space to take. Then I decided to take a particular parking space and took a sharp left turn to occupy that parking space. It so happened I was occupying a second space on my right by about one foot. If there were lot of cars/some cars or was a holiday/festival day, I would have reversed my car and parked properly. I decided to leave it the way I parked (taking a foot of the second space) because there was no car in the whole parking lot. You can call that “laziness”.
DeleteI would have apologized and parked properly if only she did not have that arrogant and harsh voice.
Indu, please visit here as often as possible. Thanks.
A smile, soft words and humility in speech will serve any purpose a person stands for.Being the manager of a temple she should have held these three things.Nice post.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Sarala. You are absolutely correct.
Delete