Recently we received an
invitation to an Indian wedding. At the
bottom of the invitation the following words were printed - “We request no
boxed gifts, please”.
Excuse me? What exactly does that mean? I’ll give my humble opinion regarding that in
just a moment.
Before we go into that
topic let’s talk about wedding gifts in general. It used to be that invitations
were just that – invitations. Gifts were never mentioned on the invitation. That’s the way it should be, right? Well,
let’s think about that and some of its disadvantages.
If you don’t mention
anything about gifts then newly married couples will end up with 14 popcorn
makers, 6 electric rice cookers, and 4 toasters. Oh by the way, none of those items are needed
because the couple already has TWO of each item – thanks to the groom and bride
having it from when they were single.
But I digress.
People of Indian origin
who are getting married in the USA
There are advantages to
having a Wedding Registry. First, guests
don’t have to worry about what to buy.
Everyone already knows what the couple wants by viewing the list of
items at the store or online. Also, you
can select the items according to your budget.
Furthermore you don’t have to carry the gift with you to the wedding or
do the dreaded gift-wrapping that takes you 15 minutes to complete but the
bride and groom will rip it open in 4 seconds and won’t even remember what the
wrapping paper looks like.
About 15 years ago,
Wedding Registry was considered rude. It
also took the fun and surprise out of gift giving. Being registered was like begging for a gift
and saying “Hey Mr. and Mrs. Guest, buy me this and buy me that.” Tacky! Nowadays though, it is widely accepted by everyone
including the Indian social circles in the USA
So in my life I have
received wedding invitations from Indians and non-Indians. Regarding gifts, I have
seen the following (or some variation of it) on the invite:
Invitations that do not
mention a gift at all.
Invitations that said: “No
gifts, please.”
Invitations requesting
that guests please donate to a particular charity as opposed to buying a gift
for the event.
Invitations that said: “Your
presence is the only present we desire.”
Now let’s get back to what
I originally asked, because this is the first time I received an invitation
that said “No Boxed Gifts, Please.” Again,
what exactly does that mean?
Come on now, we all know
what it means. It means “Bring us a gift but make sure that it’s a CASH gift. You see only CASH is accepted at this wedding. Keep your stupid boxes at home.”
I may be old fashioned on
this one but in my opinion, asking for a gift is not really decent, even if
everyone else is doing it. Add to that,
you are now outright asking for CASH? I
didn’t know that I was attending the wedding of 2 beggars. Why don’t you just sit
outside the wedding hall and panhandle all the people walking by for some spare
change. Why don’t you just say that
there is a minimum admission charge of $25 but no maximum. It’s tacky, lacks decency, and certainly
classless.
You know I may have given
a CASH gift or I may have not. It was a
choice that I had to make but the invite isn’t giving me a choice. Now don’t be afraid to disagree with me. If you
think I’m wrong or I’m taking it the wrong way, go ahead and say something
now. Because I’m a “literal meaning”
kind of guy.
The words said “No Boxed
Gifts, Please” right? So I’m thinking
about buying a gift and instead of putting it in a beautiful gift box, I’ll
just give it in a plastic bag to the newly married couple. Or maybe I just have too much class for that.
