No…this is not a review of
the Owen Wilson / Vince Vaughn movie that came out in 2005 with the same title. I am talking about real life people who
actually attend weddings uninvited (aka wedding crashers).
There are two types of wedding
crashers.
Type 1 - Invited guests who bring
along a few extra people with them to a wedding. Those few extra guests are not on the guest
list and were not mentioned during the RSVP head count. They are just last minute people who showed
up unexpected and uninvited to the wedding.
Your “know it all” uncle is
in town and staying at your place boring you with his knowledge of
politics. You have to attend a wedding
and when you mention it to him, his response is “I love weddings.” Shaking your
head in disbelief, you know what you have to do. Congratulations you are now bringing along a
wedding crasher – type 1.
I guess a single wedding
crasher (or two) is ok if 500 people are going to attend the wedding/reception
with no specific seating arrangements at the event. However nowadays it’s not ok, as every wedding
detail is accounted for (including seating arrangements). At the reception, cocktails
are followed by dinner and dinner tables have seating arrangements with name
tags at each table (yep - this is the norm over here nowadays). Congratulations once again – you have now put
the host in a difficult situation. Where
would they seat these “extra guests” who are really guests of the invited guests?
Type 2 – The more
interesting type (bold and daring). Complete strangers who show up uninvited to a
wedding/reception. They are there only
for the free alcohol and hors d'oeuvres.
They won’t stay for dinner because they know they don’t have a reserved
name tag. The will however drink alcohol
and munch on some goodies and then leave.
If this happens to be a reception that has no specified seating
arrangement, then you can bet your bottom dollar that they are staying for
dinner and beyond.
Type 2 Wedding Crashers don’t
come alone. If they come alone then they
won’t have anyone to talk to and they will stand out in a crowd. So they usually come in pairs - two guys or
two girls. Sometimes even two couples
(four people). During the entire cocktail
hour, they will just talk amongst themselves and no one will suspect anything. The
bride’s side will think they are part of the groom’s side. And, vice versa.
These wedding crashers are
always well dressed. Excellent
conversationalists. Never get drunk.
Never create trouble. I actually met a
guy who does this frequently. He told me
he gets a kick out of doing this. Total
thrill ride for him in his own mind. He
told me that if he gets caught, the maximum penalty that he has ever faced is
that the host will politely ask him to leave. And, he will leave without
causing a scene.
He also said that sometimes
it’s not just the wedding or reception that he is interested in. When he has to travel, he likes staying at
nice hotels for a really low rate. How
does he do this? Well…
Wedding Receptions are held
in very nice hotels. The host usually blocks
out a number of rooms in bulk for their out of town guests at a deeply discounted
rate. Out of town guests make their
reservations through “event booking” and then pay for the room at a discount.
So the wedding crasher just
finds a hotel, enters a date, and searches for a block of rooms associated with
a wedding and then makes a reservation. Hotels don’t know and don’t care
because it’s better to sell a room than it going empty (even at a discounted
rate). The only problem is if invited guests can’t reserve a room because the entire
block is taken already. Then the host
can ask for the names of the people who booked under their blocked
reservation. If they find an unfamiliar
name, they can inform the hotel and the hotel will cancel the reservation.
Pretty clever…in a twisted
sort of way.
So now I ask you…
Q1 – Have you ever been a
wedding crasher?
Q2 – Do you know a wedding
crasher?
Q3 – Have you ever taken
with you an uninvited guest to a wedding/reception? May be even in an
unavoidable circumstance.
Q4 – Would you want to (but
will not) experience being the wedding crasher Type 2?
No, never been a wedding crasher. But a group of college boys(around 6) crashed into my cousins wedding in Tiruchi. They were fedup of hostel food and so ended up at the wedding hall. But like you know, in Indian weddings, an extra 6 mouths is not a big count. My uncle actually felt sad for those home sick boys.
ReplyDeleteI cant even think how can we go uninvited anywhere, I wont ever go.
ReplyDeleteI am very particular not to take any thing in life if I am not eligible for it...
Some guts are needed to be a wedding crasher type 2!!
ReplyDeleteComing to your questions...
1. Have you ever been a wedding crasher? NO
2. Do you know a wedding crasher? NO
3. Have you ever taken with you an uninvited guest to a wedding/reception? May be even in an unavoidable circumstance. NO 4. Would you want to (but will not) experience being the wedding crasher Type 2? NO, Never!!
I would die of embarrassment in case I am caught and somehow such thrills dont appeal to me! :D
I have a confession to make.
ReplyDeleteIn Bombay !as a bachelor!I was always short of funds.
At Churchgate,there is a wedding hall of IMC.
I was a regular gate crashes there....
YOU MIGHT DECIDE TO BLOCK ME AFTER THIS CONFESSION
Thanks for your comments Asha. Your uncle did the right thing.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Renu. I know you are very principled.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Shilpa. I was expecting these answers from you. If you had said "yes" to any of the 4 questions, I would have died in shock.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Mr. Chowla. You have gone up in my estimation for 2 reasons. Having the guts to do it. Having the guts to tell about it.
ReplyDeleteA very practical post.In Kerala now a days this tendency has has started as the entire family reaches the venue.Till a decade before it was a matter of below dignity,weddings being attended by all the members.
ReplyDeleteLaughing out loud at your comment :D
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Sarala. In the past, Tamil marriage invitations would say “request the pleasure of your company with family and friends”. Looks like in Kerala they are taking that literally.
ReplyDelete@ Shilpa,
ReplyDeleteHappy you liked my reply.
In India, there are some families that (secretly) welcome wedding crashers so that the guest count could be 'inflated', as more the no. of people, more (perceived) connections & status!
ReplyDeleteI think every family plans for a considerably high number of meals and seats (mostly) to accommodate wedding crashers.
I might have gone to a wedding along with a friend, once or twice, before many years. These days I don't waste my time attending meaningless wedding ceremonies.
Destination Infinity
Hi SG
ReplyDeleteReally nice post! When I was a kid, I knew a few girls in our locality (from good families) who would get all dressed up to eat snacks at weddings (of course they were not invited). People took them to be the kids of guests. The worst part was that their parents did not have any issues with their girls doing such a thing! My mom clearly instructed me to stay away from that group.
Such freeloaders are just so annoying...:P
@ SG, type 1 in India is not recognized as a gate crasher as all wedding invites are for friends and family. That boring uncle is obviously family.
ReplyDeleteType 2 is done by guys from college hostels who are bored with the food that is doled out in their dining halls! A lot of my friends have done this and have enjoyed the thrill.
I will tell you about a "conference crasher". There used to be a guy who used to show up at all such events organized by NGOs. I eventually spotted him. He used to come by about 11.00 AM ( just before the tea break) and leave post lunch. He attended a lot of these events by walking into hotels and searching the banquet announcements. Guess it was easier to merge into the NGO crowd- we are such a motley lot!!
Thanks for your comments Rajesh. Things are different in India, especially in Tamil weddings. As they say "comer comer goer goer no asker no teller" People come and go and nobody ask or tell anything.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Ankita. Kids as wedding crashers! Unbelievable. I agree kids should have fun. But parents should stop these kind of activities.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Meera. Conference Crasher? News to me. Never heard of this before. I have to tell this to the guy I met who is a wedding crasher and boast about Indian ingenuity.
ReplyDeleteNopes..never been a wedding crasher..I infact avoid attending many.
ReplyDeleteNice post. I loved th movie..lolz
www.numerounity.com
I have 2-3 friends from college who are wedding crashers in Chandigarh.
ReplyDeleteMy parents have dragged me to a few marriages involving their colleagues' kids etc. I liked meeting people (mostly males) of my age and talking to them. You normally have friends similar to you in thought and outlook, and meeting others who are getting bored themselves is kind of good.
Thanks for your comments Ekta. I am glad you are not a wedding crasher. But why do you avoid attending when you are invited? Weddings are fun. Again, may be you have your own reasons.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Karunesh. Did you by chance go to DAV College? Attending wedding with parents will not be considered wedding crashing.
ReplyDelete