Note: Mr. KP (https://kparthas.blogspot.com) is the best story teller I have come across. I always wanted to imitate him in story telling. Finally, after several rough drafts, here is the story I wrote.
James nervously watched as his girlfriend, Emily, chatted with his parents at the dinner table. He had always been close to his family, and their opinion of Emily mattered deeply to him. He needn't have worried. Emily's warmth and charm had captivated his parents from the moment they met her.
Over plates of home-cooked lasagna, Emily effortlessly engaged in conversations about art, her recent travels, and her passion for volunteering at the local animal shelter. James couldn't help but notice the fond smiles exchanged between his parents and Emily. They seemed genuinely impressed, and he felt a swell of pride mixed with relief.
As dessert was served, Emily shared a humorous story that had everyone at the table laughing. It was then that James's mother, a woman of few words but sharp wit, leaned forward slightly and said, "If this doesn't work out, Emily dear, we're dumping him and keeping you."
There was a moment of surprised silence, followed by laughter from everyone at the table, including Emily, who blushed slightly at the unexpected compliment.
As they said their goodbyes that night, James's mother pulled Emily aside for a brief moment. "Thank you for coming tonight, Emily," she said sincerely. "It was a pleasure to finally meet you. And remember what I said earlier—we meant every word of it."
Emily smiled warmly and gave James's mother a heartfelt hug.
Now I understand how you narrate stories and incidents so beautifully
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Anonymous. If you had given your identity, it would be easier for me to give you credit for the comment.
DeleteI enjoyed the descriptive narration to build tension and then ending it with humor!!!
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DeleteThanks for your comments Swarna.
The ending could've been punchier. Like the mother asking Emily to stay and James to leave ;)
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Rajesh.
DeleteThis story reminds me of why I was more nicer funnier and had engaging conversations with people outside my home.... because outsiders are easily impressed by fresh faces and new conversations and that was followed by loads of compliments .....at home it was always criticizing and correcting mistakes.....(for the better i am sure). James parents also fell for the newness of Emily for a few hours....interesting write SG
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Thanks for your comments Dee. You have an excellent point.
DeleteThe first comment was posted by me only. By mistake I posted it as anonymous
ReplyDeleteThanks Gowri.
DeleteNicely narrated creating some tension and ended with humor. Welcome more and more stories, SG .
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Sakthidharan.
DeleteA beautiful story crisply written with clarity.
ReplyDeleteI liked the way the lady of the house endeared herself with Emily with her witty remark about dumping her son James in favour of Emily! There is a subtle message here for all how to build bridges of lasting harmony.
Keep the stories coming up weekly once or more in varied genres!
Thanks for your comments Mr. KP. I will try.
DeleteThat was a smart and witty one from James' mom! Probably the best compliment a girl can get from her boyfriend's parents!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Pradeep.
DeleteAha! Tried a new step, successful. Liked it S.G.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Sarala.
DeleteNamaste - Very nicely written. In the vein of KP sir's writing. Regards - Mahesh
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Mahesh. And, welcome to my blog.
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