Do you like or hate your neighbor? Most of my readers know I am an extreme extrovert. But I do not talk to any of my neighbors. My wife, another extreme extrovert, socializes with all the neighbors.
According to Harris Interactive, a research firm, people are picky about their neighbors. (Please keep in mind this survey was done in the United States.) Here is what they want in their neighbors:
Speak their own language
Have same or similar family configuration
Same ethnicity/caste/clan
Watchful neighbors – the one who helps when in need
But the one they hate the most is a “renter”. People want their neighbor to be a homeowner like themselves. Renters do not maintain their home. Yards are not mowed and there are weeds growing. Because of that, the whole neighborhood’s property value will go down.
Do you like your neighbor?
No, I haaaaaaaate my neighbors a lot because they are monsters. A neighbor (the right one) already stole four of my cats. The other neighbor (the front) put poison and killed three of my cats. And the left neighbor's killed my mother's cat just because she went into his daughter's closet. What can I do? I just think the fate punishes bad people! Now my cats have to be stuck at home...
ReplyDeleteI don't know my neighbors that much. When we were in flats, we knew many people around us. But in independent houses, there is not much interaction except in situations when we need to talk to each other.
ReplyDeleteI hate neighbors when they come out of their homes to talk loudly on their cell phones or blare music during festivals.Otherwise, they are O.K.
Destination Infinity
I don't know even a single neighbor :( Not many friendly people around.
ReplyDeleteOh! i have good connect with my neighbours. Though i am choosy and can be close to only a few.
ReplyDeleteI like neighbours, for many an occasion I have experienced their brotherhood and I do reciprocate in the same way also.But I don't go very closer engaging in gossips and scandals, which are also products of neighbourhood.Nice post short and useful.
ReplyDeleteI am an introvert basically. So, I don't go to my neighbours usually, I am not comfortable and I am concerned if I disturb them. But, I know them as the people here in Pune are very friendly compared to my own state capital Bangalore.
ReplyDeleteSome neighbour click and some don't. I don't have any friends here, at the present flat yet. I don't like nosy, criticizing neighbours. Otherwise OK. But nowadays people are very careful even to do small talk to other people, I have noticed!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Camila. Sorry you ended up with bad neighbors.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Rajesh. I also do not talk to my neighbors.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Ash. Surprised. I thought there are lot of friendly people in Santa Clara.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments. Pick and choose is a good policy.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Sarala. You are lucky.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Sindhu. I am glad you have friendly neighbors in Pune.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Sandhya. Yes, people are very careful.
ReplyDeleteYour wife is a great person if she is able to interact with all kinds of neighbors. I am not saying you are not cool, but she definitely is cooler.
ReplyDeleteThere are 2 aspects to liking someone's neighbors. Firstly, it is kind of obvious that people like people who are similar to them. I read your blog because you are some sort of Indian, because you are kind enough to comment on mine, and because you show different aspects of life in another country to me.
Secondly, there has to be some sort of familiarity-breeds-contempt thing. Camila's comment above shows this. But I think she really has bad neighbors. After some time, everyone will get to hate their neighbors for one reason or other: too bad, too good, too loud, too quiet, jealous of us, making us jealous of themselves etc. etc.
Funny thing, according to the 'contempt' thought, the only difference between you and your wife is that you are hating your neighbors a few years before she does that. Ask her, who is cooler now?
Thanks for your comments Karunesh. Thanks for complementing my wife. Will pass along your complements. I don’t hate my neighbors. I just don’t talk to them. That is all. When we come home and park our car in the drive way, I just get out of the car and go straight inside our home. My wife, if she sees a neighbor standing outside, will exchange a few words. And, that exchange will be minimum 20 minutes.
ReplyDeleteWe cant always choose our neighbors... Back in India I knew most of our neighbors, here in the US staying in apartments means very little to almost zero interaction with our neighbors. I havent even seen most of them.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Reshma. You are correct. In USA, apartment living has no contact with the neighbors.
ReplyDeleteI hardly know my neighbours. But had a tiff with the next door neighbour, a few days ago. They have this weird habit of keeping their garbage in front of our door, when they have more than enough space around their apartment to keep it without being an eye sore. I tolerated it for a while as they would usually keep it when the sweeper was about to come in the morning. But that day they kept it in the evening and that became the trigger point! Instead of acknowledging the wrong the woman is arguing that she didnt know who kept it!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Shilpa. She did not know who kept it? Garbage walked by itself from her home? Give me a break. I know it is frustrating. We had similar experience. A few years ago, we lived in India (Chennai) for 9 months. The guy who supplies milk in the morning will put the milk packet in a basket we used to put outside our flat. Some days, the packets will be missing. Especially during festival days.
ReplyDeleteI don't mind neighbors, and if they are nice people there is no harm in talking with them, but I keep a safe distance from people who are always looking to take advantage of it. I hate when people would want to leave their house keys with us and expect their children or whoever to come and ring the bell for the keys. There can be other nuisances, so I feel keeping a safe distance is much better, than being overly friendly with neighbors. People should know that in an emergency the neighbours are there to help, but should not be made to be a kind of care taker of their keys and other irritating stuffs.
ReplyDeleteI am OK with my neighbours so kong as I don't get disturbed by their noise.
ReplyDeleteWhat you are saying is absolutely right.In our condo,there are expats who live in their own world
Thanks for your comments Rama. As you said, better to keep a safe distance.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Mr. Chowla. As long as they don't bother us, it is ok.
ReplyDeleteMy neighbor (family) is an aunty who dominates her husband completely and most of time is annoyed by the poor chap :P
ReplyDeletebut she is a voracious reader, also maintains a nice garden...good in many ways :)
Thanks for your comments Ankita. So the uncle is a wuss! At least, I am happy she does not bother the neighbors.
ReplyDeleteIn American movies has those big houses with green lawns and well without walls! What a good neighbor! Here where I live is very dangerous not have walls ):
ReplyDeleteI dont know my neighbors either. Not sure if its a plus or minus coz U never know who is in ur neighborhood.
ReplyDeleteIT can be a criminal / killer :(
My Imaginations have no limit when neighbors r silent
It is interesting. I just realized I don't know anything about my neighbors :(. Back in India, in the village I grew up, the neighbors are like a part of the family.
ReplyDeleteBut both in Bangalore and now here in Charlotte, we hardly talk to neighbors. I just smile at them when walk across, other than that nothing..
Thanks for your comments Camila. Please do not form any opinion by looking at the movies. In USA, there are big houses and small houses. Good neighbors and bad neighbors.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments Afshan. And, welcome to my blog. Your imagination is interesting. It is better to keep a distance from the neighbors.
ReplyDeleteAfshan, please visit here as often as possible. Thanks.
Thanks for your comments Hal. And, welcome to my blog. In USA, neighbors are more friendlier in independent houses. Not that much in apartments/condos.
ReplyDeleteHal, please visit here as often as possible. Thanks.
I am also very choosy about making friends with neighbors. It is definitely a "No No" to people who do not appear warm.
ReplyDeleteI remember this family who came to our opposite house as tenants. Thinking it will be a help to my maid to earn some more money, I asked them to employ her if they are planning to take the help of a maid. And their reply came as a shocker, "So, do you get commission for that?"
Thanks for your comments PMT. And, welcome to my blog. Such a rude neighbor! Feel like punching in the face.
ReplyDeletePMT, please visit here as often as possible. Thanks.
I live in an apartment and never talked to my neighbors unless they talked to me. Some times I would say good morning only if I was having a good morning if not then no.
ReplyDeleteOne day I was in need of help. And guesss who came to my rescue???. My neighbor. The police had stopped me that morning while driving in the freeway. One of my break lights was out. It was not working. I tried changing the bulbs by myself and it still the light didn't work. I went to my neighbor when he got out of his house and asked him to help me, because I was out of ideas on how to solve my problem without having to take my car to a place where they were going to charge me for fixing something I could probably take care of myself. My neighbor helped me: He went inside his house, got his tools, found what was wrong with the light, went with me to the store to find the part that was not working, installed it and then from now on he always asks me if things are ok with my car, if I need anything him and his wife are always there to help. I did ask for help already a second time. I wouldn't waste the neighbors offering help. I did have a gesture already with them and got them something to say thank you for being such good neighbors.